Jokes
Common lines after people obtain drunk
1. Tu to Mera bhai hai…bhai !!!
2. You know i am not drunk…
3. Gaadi mein Chalaunga…
5. Tu bura mat maann bhai…
6. Mai teri Dil Se Izzat Karta hu…
7. Abe bol daal aaj usko, aar yaa paar….
8. Aaj saali Chad nahi rahi hai kya baat hai??
9. Tu Kya samajh raha hai mujhe chad gayi hai…
10. Ye mat samajh ki peeke bol raha hu…
11. Abe yaar kahin kam to nahi padegi itnee…
12. Chhote, Ek Ek Chhota aur ho Jae…lovely waala !!!
13. Baap ko mat Sikhao…
14. Yaar magar tune mera dil tod diya…
15. Kuchh bhi hai par saala Bhai hai Apna…
16. Tu Bolna Bhai, kya chahiye…Jaan chahiye hazir hai ???
17. Abe mere ko aaj tak nahi Chadee…shart laga saala aaj tu..
18. Chal teri baat karata hoon usse, phone number de uska…
19. Saale teri bhabhie hai wo…bhabie ki nazar se dekh usko…
20. Yaar tu samjha kar.. wo tere layak nahi hai…
21. chal bhai tu kah raha hai to tere liye chodh diya usko.. aaj se wo teri…bana issi baat par ek – ek aur peg !!!
22. Tujhe kya lagta hai chadh gayi hai… abhi ek full aur khatam kar sakta hun…
and the best one…
23. Yaar aaj uski bahut yaad aa rahi hai
And Finally…
Salla… aaj se daru band……………!!!
How Girlz rate Guyz?
Girls’ relationship with guys is a bigger mystery than girls themselves.
It’s not just approximately boyfriends, we’re talking approximately man friends that gals have.
Do you have a gal who is just a friend? Are confused why the frequency of calls increases as exams loom closer? Or why she always hangs around with the moron who isn’t fit to wear Jeetendra’s white shoes? Here’s a ready reckoner for you:
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% just a friend %
Well, you are like a show piece in my house. I will call you whenever I need you. If you call me home the chances are 9 out of 10 times she might say, “Oh Aaditya, I am going out can you call me after 2 days??”
Aaditya: “Where are you going Shilpa??”
Shilpa: “None of your business” & bangs the phone.(Useless fellow.Hmmph! ).
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% Good Friend %
You are like a TV remote control. I need you & I know that. But I try using you when I really need you.
Aaditya calls: “Hi Shilpa”,
Shilpa: “Hi Aaditya. I am going out with family I will call you back. Bye”
(Shilpa calls back after two days)
Shilpa: “What do you want Aaditya? Why did you call that day?”.
Aaditya: “Generally”.
Shilpa: “Oh ok. I received to go out. Will call you later. Bye.”
Will call when she needs lecture notes or some concert tickets.
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% Very satisfactory friend %
Well you are like the pressure cooker safety value for the girl.
She will need you when she wants to bring out her pain or anger on someone.
Basically, she wants to talk to you. And you are special to her.
Shilpa: “You know Aaditya, Shekhar is not eating. He doesn’t sleep & is not able to concentrate on his studies. I think he doesn’t like me anymore. And yesterday I saw him with another girl”.
Aaditya: “Who is Shekhar??”
Shilpa : “My boyfriend.”
Aaditya: Oh! Ok.
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% Best Friend %
You are like the auto rickshaw driver. She can’t live without you.
And don’t be mistaken. You are not her boyfriend. But you are allowed to take her little doggie around the park so that he (not you!) can have fun.
Aaditya Shopping. Aaditya Movie. Aaditya Coffee. Aaditya,you pay. I am having fun.
Aaditya is now sure that he should go ahead & propose. He dares.
Shilpa: “But I thought we were just friends. We should remain friends
Aaditya. Plus, I have a boy friend you know that.”
Aaditya: What?? (Aaditya drinks all night).
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% Best of the Best Friends %
Ok now you are really special.
You are dad-cum-boyfriend- cum-brother- cum-everything.
Ultimately you are the darling servant of the girl.
You take her around.
You make her project.
You do her assignments.
You are allowed to take her doggie around.
You can hold hands on the beach.
You can see the sun set with her (because she wants to do everything she drags you along).
But yet but… Don’t be mistaken. She has a boyfriend who works for a huge software company & earns 3 times the salary you earn & has a flat in PoesGardenor Boat Club or Hiranandani area.
Shilpa: “Hi Aaditya. I am getting engaged to Shekhar. Shekhar this is Aaditya, he is my bestest friend”.
Aaditya: Hi Shekhar . (Hand shake. Shekhar breaks Aaditya’s wrist).
Aaditya is now heart broken & wrist broken.
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% Boyfriend %
Uh… No comments dude. You’re already Gone!
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